I grew up in an Italian “Catholic” family. We were the typical family that went to church on the Holidays of Easter & Christmas and because I went to Catechism, there were times when the whole family had to go. I made all my sacraments and still to this day do not know what they ever really taught me but that Jesus loved me. My parents had a terrible marriage/relationship, divorced when I was about 13 and I was not very close to either one of them. So when I turned 18 and was living on my own, I found out I was pregnant. I do not know why I went to my mom but I did and she right away told me that I was to get an abortion. I did not even question her. My father paid for it. I remember thinking, “aren’t we killing a baby”, but I just went with it. We told the father of the baby who was my boyfriend at the time that I had a miscarriage. I was so numb about everything in life. Fast forward about 13 years and I had been married, had 2 children and now divorced. I found myself single and really partying as if I was 18. I had been promiscuous and been with 2 men in one week. When I discovered I was pregnant again, I did not know who the father was, I was a single mom who had a demanding job and hey, my parents brought me the first time around so it must be ok. I had blinders on and in my thoughts, there was NO other option.
I write all this now knowing that I would have a 32 & 19-year-old sons named Adam and Joseph. I know now that my mother went through her own crisis and had tried to abort me. However, in the 60’s abortion was illegal and when my dad and she went to the abortion “house” she looked around, got scared and could not go through with it. Both of my parents were told by their own families that they had to get married and that was the “right thing to do”. Now, she is divorced and when I announced my pregnancy, she went back in time and decided I was not going to make the same mistakes she did. My father agreed.
However, I look at this simple summary of my life and see all the lies I believed and how generational curses can really affect families with no real understanding of the spiritual fight going on around us. God has radically turned my life upside down and I now have eyes to see, ears to hear and the power of the Holy Spirit living inside me. I have gone back in my mind and regretted my choices and I know that IF ONLY someone had spoken to me, spoken life to me, I would not have done it. If only, I had a sonogram to see the beating heart I would not have done it. I was so sold out on the whole women lib movement and that it was “my body my choice”.
I have made peace with God and know that He has forgiven me and I was even more convinced of that truth after taking the Bible study “Forgiven & Set Free”. I am now so passionate in helping women. Just telling the truth. That they DO have options.
Carolyn is a client advocate/counselor at a local Pregnancy Resource Center and she has led several women to Christ which led to them choosing life for their babies. God has restored her marriage to her husband. They have two children and when their daughter got pregnant at 19, they, without a blink, chose life! Now they have a healthy vibrant 5-year-old boy keeping them young! She is passionate about her calling and gives God ALL THE GLORY for many Blessings.