Dana W.

“Thank God that while in the hospital a friend witnessed to me and told me that God wanted a relationship with me. That day my life changed!”

I wasn’t raised in a Christian home and as a child I didn’t know the value of life. But when I got pregnant at a young age, I instinctively knew that I wanted to have and keep my baby. I had always dreamed of being a mother. I had never heard of the word “abortion”. Abortion was introduced to me by those whom I trusted.

I think the real turning point for me to decide to go through with the abortion was when I came home one day and saw a family member crying so hard they were sobbing. They didn’t want me to go away to have the baby, but also wasn’t offering any alternative solutions. I did not want to see them hurting, so, I finally just said, “I don’t want to see you crying like this, so I will just go have an abortion.” Those words seemed to be the solution to my problem, I gave in. When I said those words and went for the procedure, I truly didn’t understand what I was doing. What I thought was that it would help someone I love quit crying. I had an abortion to please those I cared for. I learned later this was a big mistake.

I was around seven weeks pregnant and immediately afterwards, I felt very confused. I knew I didn’t have the baby I wanted, yet no one was talking about it so I pushed any feelings of grief and loss away. I equated abortion with fixing a problem and something good since others and Planned Parenthood had framed it that way.

This confused thinking led me to a testimony that did not end there. No one ever warned me about the denial, shame, and heartache that would follow. I became so full of confusion! My breaking point was after having an abortion I couldn’t stop crying. Thank God that while in the hospital a friend witnessed to me and told me that God wanted a relationship with me. That day my life changed!

As I began to heal, I got real involved at church. While leading small groups, people would begin to share about their abortions but I still couldn’t tell them about mine. Although I was saved, the enemy had me trapped in condemnation. It took me understanding that there was help for those of us who have had an abortion and allowing myself to grieve the losses in a safe place before I could truly accept God’s forgiveness and forgive myself. God had to work with me in layers. It has taken me years to work through the losses and heartaches.

By attending post-abortive Bible studies, I have learned that healing is a process, and that in our heartache and pain, we are not alone. Although I will be healing until I meet Jesus face to face, I can now say that I have healed to a place where I can help others. If you are hurting, please call the International Helpline at 866.482.LIFE. Someone will listen to you, help you find a local recovery group, mail you a packet of resources and follow-up with you to make sure you have found the help you were wanting. Your life will be forever changed!

Dana is married, faithful to her home church, and has four living children. She is an RN and has volunteered at her local pregnancy center and co-led abortion recovery groups. Dana is a part-time phone consultant on the International Helpline for Abortion Recovery and Prevention and is passionate about helping heal after abortion. She will take your call, listen, and help you find the freedom that she has experienced.

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